July 11th, 2003: All-Star Open Practice

The Game Notes take an elevator with Nancy Lieberman, are almost hit with a stray pass, and have the misfortune of seeing Katie Smith in her sports bra.


These notes are a bit inconsistent when it comes to tense. I really don't feel like cleaning up. Just assume that if it's in the present that's when I wrote it, and if it's in the past I was assuming that it would make sense now.

Oy. Fucking. Vey. They took forever seating a veritable horde of small children from various camps. Honestly. Several of my friends said that STHs should have first priority. Natch I agreed, but what are you going to do. We rode in the elevator, since I have a friend with a wheelchair. We shared the elevator with Nancy Lieberman. *squeak* Cool beans... even if she does trash the Liberty and tend to lay a curse on whoever she talks about. These notes are from the second row of courtside seats, just about center court. Good stuff, man, good stuff. I think this thingy’s going to be televised; there are a shitload of cameras, plus the aforementioned NancyLieberman. That and there’s a rack of balls with "WNBA ESPN2 ShootAround Skills Challenge" on them. The teams just wandered out. Both teams. Or parts of both teams. Lieberman’s pestering PeeWee right now.

Some sort of shooting random thing is going on. Dawn Staley’s being a little goofy. There’s a yelling idiot behind me. Cash is next. Meanwhile, Katie Smith is changing. In public. Apparently manners in Ohio and Minnesota are different… Ah. Now there’s a whole bunch of shooting and running around going on. It’s mostly guards out here… we’ve got Teasley, Nolan, Pee-Wee, Dixon, Bird, Smith, Staley, Catchings, and Cash. Everyone’s testing accuracy and such. You can tell it’s not real, because they’re wearing earrings. Apparently Dawn has forgotten how to throw a simple chest pass. Sheeeeeesh. (Wow. We’re close enough that I can see the scarring on Catchings’ knee.)

Okay, they just headed back down the hallway. It’s about twenty to two. Everyone looks good except for Dawn Staley, whose passing has been kinda weak. This isn’t of the good. So far I’ve seen Liberty fans (duh), a pair of Houston fans, and a couple of Fever fans.

Ah. This makes sense now. They were practicing before. This is real. They’re all back out int heir jerseys, and that dingbat idiot announcer from the Sun is doing the announcing duties. Bummer. They’re hanging out on the bench. Catchings is talking a mile a minute to Cash and Cash looks like she could care less. Pee-Wee and Dawn seem to be amusing each other. Nikki Teasley had her groove goin’ on. Lieberman was pestering Sue Bird. Pee-Wee did a practice run. Now the dorkwad is trying to annoy people. I wish he would go away.

First matcup was a classic, Catchings vs. Cash, Tennessee vs. Connecticut. Cash and Connecticut won. Next was Katie Smith vs. Nikki Teasley. Teasley couldn’t land the outlet, so Smith won the matchup. Next was Dawn Staley vs. Deanna Nolan. Nolan couldn’t throw it in the ocean, so Staley won the matchup hands down. Swin and Katie seem to be amusing themselves over on the bench. Last was Sue Bird vs. Tamecka Dixon. Bird’s been a joy to watch, sheer poetry in motion. She kicked Dixon’s ass. Cash and Staley went up against each other. Swin couldn’t hit a thing, so Staley moved on. Smith vs. Bird… Katie just sucked. Staley vs. Bird now. Staley got it together and Bird couldn’t hit the shot. East wins. If only it were always that easy.

Catchings was signing and slapping hands with everyone. Gotta love the girl. Becky also showed up, wheelchair-bound after her surgery. She’s got a plaid blouse thing going on. They’re doing a little video about the league. Katie’s on the cell right now. Catchings is talking to some kids. Squee. I swear, I don’t think any kid is going to leave this place without meeting Catchings.

Kiddies are all well and good, and getting them involved in the game is very laudable… but it’s after three and we haven’t seen a practice yet, and I’m BORED! Finaly. 3:15, and we’ve finally got most of the West stars. Some of them were a little slow in coming out. Nice of them to join us. Leslie has a wrist brace and is in streets. Sheryl Swoopes has something of a cast-like nature on her right foot- my friend thought it might be ice. LJ is tan and looks like she’s relishing the opportunity to tuck in her jersey. Leslie says she’s playing, most likely. No explanation on the wrist brace. Dydek looks lost. It’s amusing to see LJ standing behind her and looking short. They’re about to start dancing. Oh, my god. No. Just… Katie Smith has no groove. Nor does Lisa. Adrian Williams got some moves on her, though. So does Yo. Couldn’t see Ferdy. The kiddies love Lisa. They’ve been chanting her name for a while. She and Dawn Staley were messing around for a while. Much amusement was perpetrated, involving a handbag. (The image of Dawn Staley with a handbag is... disturbing.) Matt what’s-his-face interviewed Leslie and Swoopes. LJ’s been watching the whole thing with this very odd expression on her face. (Someday, LJ, someday they will appreciate you, don’t worry.) Adrian Williams handles the ball pretty well for a big girl. Dydek... not so much. Now we’re seeing the fancy stuff… Yo with the finger roll, Dydek with a one-handed jam, and Sue just jumped up to grab the rim/net. FYI, Jackson is starting for Thompson, he pretty much said. He’s got Yo at the three right now. It amuses me, but if he doesn’t stop calling Leslie “Smooth,” I’ma have to smack him around. They did some drills, now they’re practicing the halfcourt shot for a hundred bucks. Teasley had one rim out, someone else’s went off the back of the rim. Yo off the side/corner of the rim. Dydek’s was pathetic, Ferdy off the rim, LJ airballed it, but Bird saved Seattle’s honor... except she was shooting as Swoopes’ proxy, so Sheryl got the money. Cooper seems to have a thing for dancing. I will never look at Teasley the same way again- Storm folk, think of Doppler gone terribly, terribly wrong. Yo got her some grooooove. Leslie can’t dance. Adrian Williams getting crazy! Then there were scary white-girl moves when Smith and Dydek got in. Bird doesn’t want to dance. Apparently dancing is not a big thing in Seattle. They seem like strange people. (The All-Stars, not just the Storm.)

Media availability/autograph session from hell: I netted Deanna Nolan. A few other folk were signing as well, but stupid little kids kept getting in my way! Deanna Nolan is a sweetheart; she got Swin Cash to come over for some folk. Leslie wasn’t signing; her wrist, you know . Spoon got to wheel Becky around the Garden. Tari’s back, whoot! Annyway. We got to hear a proclamation from the mayor’s office and something from the City Council. Dawn Staley flashed the camera. *laughter* The councilwomen got the names wrong; my favorite was when she referred to “Lauren Johnson”. Good lord. Someday they’ll all know her name.

East practicing now. Nat Williams is one big lady. ‘Kesha Sales has the wild hair going on again, like a mutant Chia Pet. Big Country may yet ride again. (long story). The whole gang’s here. Becky looks fuckin’ miserable; either she’s in a lot of pain, she really wants to play, or- most likely of all- some combination of both. Tari’s being cute. And people think they can get players to sign during the practice. Not too bright, these people. Don’t worry, Nat wasn’t grabbing his butt, she was fixing his mike. Dawn’s got some nice sneakers going on, I feel the need to mention that. Richie does things differently from Mr. Cooper; he’s got the starters and the reserves segregated, while Cooper mixed them. He also explains more than Cooper does. One of the guys was telling Nykesha that they had music for the West practice, and she was saying, "Can we get some of that?" But I think Richie is a lot more focused on the game than Cooper is. There’s less nonsense, a good trick for a team with Tari, Spoon, Pee-Wee, and Staley. I notice that Richie does a lot more with the starters than Cooper did. That’s odd, since I think Cooper is even more reliant on his starters than Richie. The East team looks confused; they don’t get a lot of what Richie’s tryin’ to say. I think it’s finally penetrating, though. Shooting contests now. Those are always fun. Especially when half the team takes their jerseys off. Jeez, guys, this isn’t an extension of the lockeroom. Now they’re going against each other. Richie does not need a job as play-by-play dude anywhere. Pee-Wee and Spoon were dancing as Spoon defended Pee-Wee. Cooper’s assessment of the East seems to be right, there’s a lot of running and fast-breaking going on. Okay, that’s over. We’ve got some stuff going on now. Landed some ink from Catchings; that girl plays the game the same way she leads her life- she’s everywhere! You just have to love her. If you don’t like Tamika Catchings, I think there’s something wrong with you.

Was like the women's basketball version of Oldtimers' Day there, or maybe the top 50 of all time or somethin'. Took the elevator with Lieberman, spotted Ann Meyers, of course Blaze was there, saw Anne Donovan in the longest pair of blue jeans on the planet earth, and someone had a Pat Summit 'graph on their Liberty jersey- don't know if that was recent or not, though. I was half-expecting Cheryl Miller to materialize out of thin air.

So all in all it was a decent time. It would have been better if there hadn’t been as much crap that made it so long. It was an interesting look inside All-Star Land and into what makes some of these players tick. But we got to see a lot of cool stuff, and for me, it was worth all the crap to be courtside for two Catchings fast breaks and Bird running the skills challenge. Those were amazing.

I saw you behind the bench, Joe. Anyone else there?