May 8th, 2008: Washington at New York (preseason)

Washington Mystics 58, New York Liberty 52

The kids are definitely all right, Megan Duffy is a point guard, Lindsay Bowen is not a point guard, and the Mystics are caught using cheap knockoff rookies.


So that was an interesting hybrid of an exciting game and a preseason mess. To say the least. Clearly, both teams were missing the steadying presence of their starters- but the Liberty missed Loree Moore and Janel McCarville a lot more than the Mystics missed Coco Miller and Nakia Sanford.

Lots of kids. Lots of screaming kids. My eardrums are still weeping in a corner for the abuse they suffered today, and devoutly wish we'd all gone to the office. This is, however, a minority opinion.

Got to watch shootaround from courtside, thanks to lackadaisical security and Ali's season seats. Everyone knows Ali. You probably know Ali, even if you don't know you know her. Shay is a freakin' ninja- I looked over, saw Erin shooting, looked over to the tunnel, looked back again, and suddenly Shay was perched on the scorer's table wall thingy like she'd been there for two hours. Chandi Jones had very obviously just gotten off the plane- near the end of shootaround, she stopped to sign a card for me, noticed that I had an Amber Jacobs card right next to hers, and said, "Oh, she's not here today." Which would have been a lot less funny if Jacobs hadn't just sprinted down the ramp behind her. She'd managed to mix Jacobs up with Coco Miller (who, um, was there, but didn't play, so half-credit, I guess).

Does Alana Beard seriously expect anyone to believe she finished last season with a crop and started this season with a shoulder-length ponytail naturally? If a white-ass white girl like me can tell that those are extensions, you might want to do a better job with your extensions. She played more sparingly than usual, no surprise, and looked good doing it. Taj has, I'm convinced, found the Fountain Of Youth, because she looks as good as she did when she started- she still has the moves, although either she's slowing down or Cathrine Kraayeveld was on her game liek woah. Currie also played less than she would have if this were a regular season game, and she looked very solid, although she did have one knockdown of… I think it was Erin Thorn? Yeah, I'll admit I don't like Currie much. Blue looks really good- I don't think the Mystics are as screwed at PG as they thought they were at the start of this offseason/season cycle. Gardner played really well- I think she's shouldering her way into the roster discussion with a bit more force than the other posts expected. I liked Vaughn, too. Jacobs had a backbreaking, heartbreaking shot to end the first half that had the refs checking the monitors to confirm that, alas, it was good. And then she was left wide open to start the third quarter. And Koehn kept getting open looks, too. PEOPLE. It's not rocket science. If Board Junkies can figure it out, y'all can figure it out. We did not get to see Crystal Langhorne in this game. We did, however, see a cheap knockoff version of her- you could tell she was a fake, the name on the jersey was Longhorne, not Langhorne, and everyone knows that's how you can tell knockoffs. Hopefully this will be remedied by the 22nd, because she really didn't have much of a presence in the game- Gardner and even Vaughn played better. Taylor used her height effectively on offense, less so on defense. Not a lot of James, not a lot of Pluimer.

Cathrine Kraayeveld. Girrrrrrrrrrl. She was working her ass off out there. I'd have to get a boxscore to count all the blocks she had, but she was all over the place. She looks good. Shameka still seemed a little discombobulated, like some of her brain was still overseas- she was on the boards well, but she took a few stupid shots and made a few stupid plays, not to mention the antics whenever she was called for a foul. Way too much Tiffani Johnson. Just. No. Make the hurting stop. Erin was very quiet- if she weren't a veteran, I'd say she was on the bubble, but I have learned not to doubt the staying power of Erin Thorn. Lindsay Bowen- nice player, but too prone to dumb mistakes to be a point guard. We're talking about backcourt, shot clock, clock management mistakes here. If we were evaluating her as a shooting guard, then she wasn't bad- but Erin, Essence, and Lisa are all above her on the depth chart, and that's counting Ashley as a forward. Yeah, no. But we were loving us some rookies. Essence was all over the place, and though I thought she overdid some of her hitting the floor, said hitting floor occurred often, including one incident where she ended up in the second row and almost took out Spoon. Essence does not get involved easily, we noticed- I sat with Ali during shootaround and the first quarter, and Ali has a tendency to whoop and holler at everyone. 'Most everyone at least looked over, even if they didn’t turn and wave. Essence? Her eyes barely moved. Cold. And we loved Erlana in the paint. Now there's someone who belongs in #24. I liked Megan Duffy as the point more than I liked Bowen. Lisa came off the bench like she was tired of not playing. Either that, or she has a bet on with Nikki Blue. Now, if we can get her to put half as much focus on defense, we might have us a real player out there. LaToya Davis… I'll take a pass. Really, I will. Leilani Mitchell still doesn't seem to be a WNBA player to me. Her size is killing her, plain and simple- she can't make the plays she knows how to make, because she can't see over or around. Also, seriously, Leilani. We know you couldn't have claimed your Phoenix number, especially not with the original owner across the way from you. But #23? #23?! I give up. You've gotta be just looking for trouble.

And again, the other team adjusts to us and we don't adjust to them. That's on everyone, but more on the coaching staff than the players. And endgame clock management- my eyebrows nearly went through my hairline after the last Liberty possession, when Coyle was talking to Bowen and Erin came over and was very animated at Bowen for a while.

I'm not amused by not playing Shay and Megan Darrah. Come on. It's preseason. Give everyone a little run and see if game scenarios change their performance. Besides, Darrah's got the brass balls to claim #25. That's gotta be worth something.

Red is a very good color for Jess. And she looks exceptionally trim. I wasn't as enthusiastic about Tiffany's outfit- something about flare khaki capris just seems unnatural to me. Patty's suit would have been fine if she'd bought it one size larger. There are things in this world I do not want to see, and bra outlines are right up there. Rollins didn't seem to be taking the game seriously, judging from the casual clothes he wore. I think I was better dressed than he was, sheesh.

As mentioned, Spoon and a very attractive friend. Oh, and Kym was there too. ;) They were a riot when one of the team ads with them appeared- this whole piggyback ride thing seems to be a tradition of sorts, although the hysterics the two of them were in by the end of it suggested to me that they'd been told, "Oh, we'll toss that in with the outtakes, don't worry about anyone seeing it." And then the two of them chatting it up with Denise Brooks-Clauser, who must be wondering who she pissed off at HQ to get the idiot linesmen she's gotten. And Spoon playing fetch with Maddie. I have missed my team so very much.

I think the image I will take away from this is actually from pregame intros: the rookies, all staring at the screen in various states of awe and excitement, either grinning like they just hit Powerball or with their jaws dropped… and Shay and Tiffany chatting with each other with knowing looks on their faces; I kinda wanted to caption that, "Remember when we were rookies and we looked like that?"

Grade incomplete. But please, no more Lindsay Bowen at the point.